Twelve Habits of the Toxic Mentor
by David Clutterbuck
Copyright David Clutterbuck
A light-hearted look at how not to mentor!
- Start from the point of view that you - from your vast experience and broader perspective - know better than the mentee what's in his or her interest
- Be determined to share your wisdom with them - whether they want it or not; remind them frequently how much they still have to learn
- Decide what you and the mentee will talk about and when; change dates and themes frequently to prevent complacency sneaking in
- Do most of the talking; check frequently that they are paying attention
- Make sure they understand how trivial their concerns are compared to the weighty issues you have to deal with
- Remind the mentee how fortunate s/he is to have your undivided attention
- Neither show nor admit any personal weaknesses; expect to be their role model in all aspects of career development and personal values
- Never ask them what they should expect of you - how would they know anyway?
- Demonstrate how important and well connected you are by sharing confidential information they don't need (or want) to know
- Discourage any signs of levity or humour - this is a serious business and should be treated as such
- Take them to task when they don't follow your advice
- Never, never admit that this could be a learning experience for you, too
David Clutterbuck is a founder director of the European Mentoring Centre and an acclaimed author on mentoring and organisational learning. He can be contacted on 01628 661919 or via david@clutterbuckassociates.co.uk
